PopHorror Let's Get Scared
One night back in 1995 my mom and I were hanging out and were both feeling bored, so I decided to go rent a movie from our local video store. A lot of movies were rented out when I got there and there wasn’t a whole lot to choose from, so I just grabbed something that looked remotely interesting. I got Jack-O and thought that maybe it would be decent in a corny sort of way and my mom and I watched it when I got home.
She never forgave me.
My wife and I watched it again on Tubi the other night because she had never seen it and I was curious about it as I didn’t remember a single thing about it. So, after all was said and done was it a lot better than I remembered or did it stink like an old pumpkin that is still sitting on someone’s porch a few weeks after Halloween?
Keep reading to find out…
Synopsis
Some goofs accidentally unleash an evil spirit who walks around with a jack-o’ lantern on his head that goes on a killing spree in a small town on Halloween.
Oh man, those mid-90’s direct to video horror films. Some of them were mighty bad, and some of them were so bad that they were good. Whenever I am feeling nostalgic about the 90s, I will watch one of them, but to be honest at best most of them were just okay and easily forgettable a few days after you watched them. Jack-O falls somewhere in the middle.
Yeah, it’s pretty bad for the most part, but it could be argued that it is so bad that it is good in a weird, warped way. It’s definitely different, but I am not sure if it is different in a good or bad way to be honest. It’s watchable, but at the same time as you are viewing it you are most likely just wanting it to end because at times it seems like it goes on forever even though it is only about 90 minutes long.
I’ll give it to director Steve Latshaw (Return of the Killer Shrews, Death Mask) as he tried his best to make an entertaining movie (and if you ever hear him talk about it he makes it out to be in the same league as movies such as Casablanca and Gone with the Wind in terms of being one of the greatest movies ever made) so he gets an “A” for effort. I’ll also give the writers props too as they at least had somewhat of a decent idea, but unfortunately nothing about the movie works for several reasons.
The premise is OK and on paper it sounds like a lot of fun, but the final product leaves a lot to be desired. I think that the people behind it took it way too seriously and honestly thought that they had the next big horror icon on their hands when they were making it, but sadly it just wasn’t to be.
So basically, the movie is about some dorky friends (who are supposed to be teenagers but look a lot older) who are messing around in the woods and end up awakening the title character who promptly slaughters them and then goes around hacking other people up on Halloween night. It turns out he is the instrument of revenge for an evil warlock that was executed back in the day, and he is running around killing people as a result.
There’s some stuff with one of the warlock’s ancestors being a witch and trying to stop the pumpkin-headed killer and some other stuff about the ancestor of the person who killed the warlock being stalked by the title character because he is the only one that can stop him, but it’s all silly and muddled that it just ends up being confusing in the end. In the words of the great Joe Bob Briggs there is too much plot getting in the way of the story here, and in the end, it hurts the movie more than it helps it in my opinion.
While Jack-O himself is sort of neat looking he also looks extremely goofy at the same time. I think that if I had someone that looked like him coming at me my first instinct would be to laugh more than anything else. I mean come on, the dude has a pumpkin on his head, for Pete’s sake! How could anyone take that seriously? Looking like a cross between Sam Hain (who is very cool) from The Real Ghostbusters and the Marvel Comics villain Jack-0-Lantern, Jack-O here isn’t the most intimidating horror movie antagonist and every time I think about his name I can’t help but think about the late Michael Jackson (who in reality was a lot scarier than this Jack-O).
Think about it for a minute: It’s Halloween night and you have this dork or Michael Myers chasing you around trying to kill you. I think I would definitely take my chances with Jack-O as he is a lot less scary or competent when it comes to hacking people to bits.
The characters just didn’t do it for me either and the acting is subpar at best. Gary Doles-who has no other acting credits at all-is quite laughable as the dad of the main character (who runs the lamest haunted garage attraction in the history of the world) that makes Bob Saget’s character on Full House seem cool in comparison. Our sort of hero is a dorky tween named Sean, that is played by the director’s son, and his acting is less than awesome (the bit where he is screaming as he is being buried alive must be seen to be believed as he comes off more bored than terrified.
I’m thinking that Linnea Quigley (Burial of the Rats, The Girl I Want) must have needed money for a car payment or something so she agreed to be in this movie just for the cash. She doesn’t do a terrible job, but at the same time you can just tell she wanted to be somewhere else (plus she has the longest shower scene in the history of film at one point for fan service purposes).
Did I mention that John Carradine (House of Dracula, The Howling) and Cameron Mitchell (Gorilla at Large, Powder River) were both in it somehow even though they had both passed away before the film was released? Oh, and if you don’t blink you will see the always awesome Brinke Stevens (Teenage Exorcist, Bad Girls from Mars) show up for about thirty seconds when some of the characters are watching a movie on TV (I suspect that this is stock footage from another film, but I am not sure). While it may not feature the worst acting I have ever seen in my life I don’t think that anyone that appeared in this movie would ever be presented with an award for the greatest actor of all time.
Jack-O is mighty bad, but honestly I’ve seen a lot worse and it isn’t a bad way to kill 90 minutes if you don’t have anything else to do and you watch it with friends while making Mystery Science Theater 3000-like comments the whole time (those guys actually did an episode of RiffTrax where they watch it that I need to check out).
Apparently the best thing about it is the commentary on the DVD that features Fred Olen Ray (who co-wrote and produced it) and Latshaw arguing the whole time to the point that the later has a little hissy fit and storms off for a few moments before returning to continue his commentary (I haven’t seen it myself, but it sounds hilarious).
Check it out if you don’t have anything better to do, and if you do maybe you can answer the huge burning question that I have about it: Why does the tween need a babysitter when his parents are right outside running their cheesy haunted garage? It isn’t like they went anywhere; they are right outside in the garage! I suppose it’s better not to think too hard about it, I guess. Then again, it’s probably better if you don’t think too hard about this movie in general.
