Seven Horror Sequels That *NEED* To Be Set In Space!

We’ve seen it before. Horror franchises run out of ideas, and what happens? Our beloved psychos and monsters get sent into space. It happened with Hellraiser. Part 4, Bloodlines, had Pinhead in space. The fourth Leprechaun film also shot for the Moon. The Prince of Darkness went out of this world in Dracula 3000. The Critters came from space and Critters 4 sent them back. The best of the lot? Probably Jason X. It took NINE Friday the 13th installments before Jason wound up there. It was so worth the wait!

What can I say? I love horror movies set in space — and I’m here to tell you, I’ve got plans. BIG plans. Here are seven… count ’em, SEVEN! horror sequels that NEED to be set in space! With tongue firmly planted in cheek, let’s check out our first interstellar horror sequel candidate…

7. Leatherface In Space

It rhymes! That gives this Texas Chain Saw Massacre sequel an amputated leg up on the competition. The bonus? The series takes place in Texas already. Houston, you have a problem! Just find a way to get ol’ Leatherface to the Johnson Space Center, and you’re halfway there! The last few TCM films have been pretty disappointing, in my opinion. You get the feeling that they’re running out of ideas. If there’s a classic horror franchise that desperately needs creative a shot in the arm, it’s this one. Frankly, I think this film practically writes itself. The satellite is family! And if Leatherface In Space doesn’t work out, well…

6. Freddy In Space

No, I’m not talking about John Squires. I’m talking about the man of your dreams, Freddy Krueger! It’s like the tagline says: EVERY town has an Elm Street. That’s gotta be true on Mars, right? Imagine a grim, dark future where a distant descendant of the Elm Street children lives in the first major Martian colony. A Martian colony that has its very own Elm Street right next to the… water purification plant, or whatever. I get chills just thinking about all of Freddy’s glorious, space-themed puns. “It’s out of this world, bitch!”

5. Saw 37 – In Space 

I’m not sure how many Saw films there are, but it’s gotta be like 30 or so at this point, right? Imagine an Earth Historian in the year 2350 studying mass murders of the 20th and 21st centuries. He stumbles across John Kramer and his sadistic pattern of moralistic punishment. He programs the data and the archived voice recordings into his android lab partner for analysis. Oh, shit! The android becomes self aware! And it’s pissed off! John Kramer-Tron is born, and he’s not happy with all the sin and excess going on in this future world! Do you want to play a game?

4. Chucky In Space

You may laugh, but this one has a real shot at happening… kind of. Don Mancini told EW that he has an idea for Chucky In Space. What is it? He won’t say. I’m thinking the problem with being Chucky is immortality. What’s the problem with immortality? If you live long enough, you’re bound to get stuck somewhere you can’t get out of. Then? You’re screwed. How much time did Chucky spend in Andy’s safe in Cult of Chucky? Quite a bit, I bet. Imagine Chucky being trapped under some rubble for hundreds of years and being unearthed by an archaeological expedition on Earth centuries later. Does it sound like Jason X? A little! But Chucky doesn’t need to be cryo-frozen to make it in to the future. He just needs to get his immortal ass trapped somewhere he can’t get out of… and hope he has a deck of cards!

3. Final Destination: Space

You didn’t think Death was confined to Earth, did you? Well these young, nubile space colonists are about to find out the hard way that Death goes wherever the fuck it wants. The movie opens with a premonition of a major space station catastrophe. Our hero(ine) narrowly averts it. The problem? Death really wanted that station gone. Permanently. Who’s killing off the station’s hottie inhabitants in increasingly gruesome, space-themed ways? Death, baby! In space, Death can definitely hear your sorry ass scream.

2. Evil Dead 4: In Space

Groovy, right? The Necronomicon sent Ash into the past to battle Deadites in Army of Darkness. Why can’t it send him into the future? Newsflash: it can! A pesky alien overlord unearths the Necronomicon and uses it to raise an army of Deadites to conquer Earth. Who’s the only one who can stop the., uh.. .Alien Apocalypse (*cough*)? The chosen one, of course: Ashley J. Williams! The problem? That guy’s stuck in 21st century Michigan, drinking Shemp’s Beer and rocking a Hawaiian shirt. Not for long! It’s time to bring the chosen one up to speed… and about 300 years into the future. Hail to the King, baby! The biggest question? Does the future have gasoline for the chainsaw? Let’s hope so!

And finally… *drumroll*

1. John Carpenter’s The Thing 2: Electric Boogaloo 

John Carpenter’s The Thing, is the greatest horror movie of all time. OF ALL TIME! So why didn’t it ever get a sequel? No, seriously. WHY did it never get a sequel? We should fix that. When the Government visits Outpost 31 in 1983, they find no one left alive. All they have are the recordings of one hard drinking helicopter pilot, R.J. MacReady. Fortunately, those recordings lead to the discovery of one big ass alien ship buried out in the ice. The Government finds it, researches its technology, and uses it to propel the U.S. Space Program to great new heights.

Fast forward 150 years (or so) and ‘Murican heroes are out exploring the stars. The problem? They’re not alone. Some very familiar THING is hunting them. “Who goes there?”

Face it: the cold and the isolation are a big part of made The Thing so creepy. So what’s colder and more isolated than space? Nothing. NOTHING! Ship it, baby!

There you have it! Seven Horror Sequels that NEED to be set in space. What do you think? Insanity or genius? Tell us in the comments!