PopHorror Let's Get Scared
Historically slasher and monster movies work when you have a physically imposing antagonist. There are exceptions such as 3 foot 6 Warwick Davis as the Leprechaun or the 150 pound Robert Englund as Freddy Krueger. Then you have the big dudes such as the 6 foot 3 Kane Hodder as Jason Voorhees or the 6 foot 1 Don Shanks as Michael Myers in Halloween 5. Other actors such as 6’4 Richard Brooker or 6’5 Ken Kirzinger also donned the hockey mask as Jason. Any of those big boys could have played Jacob Goodnight in the 2006 horror movie SEE NO EVIL. Instead, they went with a man primarily known by one name. We all know who that is now, but how did a “military brat” who grew up in Missouri become one of the most famous names in pop culture?
Let’s find out.
In order to understand why SEE NO EVIL came about you have to dive into the world of professional wrestling. The 7 foot tall Glen Jacobs was a football player at Northeast Missouri State that went undrafted in the NFL Draft following the 1991 season as an offensive guard. After getting cut in a rookie camp run by the Chicago Bears, it was clear football wasn’t the right career path. He caught the eye of veteran pro wrestler Dean Malenko who saw the 7 foot kid as something special.
After bouncing around the fading “territories”, he had a cup of coffee as Bruiser Mastino in World Championship Wrestling. Eventually he made his way to Smoky Mountain Wrestling run by legendary manager Jim Cornette. World Wrestling Federation promoter Vince McMahon noticed the 7 footer in Knoxville, Tennessee working for Cornette and signed him to a contract. Unfortunately he was asked to play an evil dentist (yes of course I’m serious) and a knockoff of popular wrestler Kevin Nash which clearly didn’t work.
Then in 1997, he got a big assist from his old boss Jim Cornette. After threatening to beat up the television director (a story for another day), Cornette was “given the book” as they say, meaning Vince McMahon wanted Jim to come up with stories for television. Cornette’s favorite movie (and holiday) is none other than John Carpenter’s Halloween and he wanted to come up with a story for the iconic wrestling character The Undertaker. He wanted a big monster to play The Undertaker’s evil younger brother much like Laurie Strode and Michael Myers in Halloween. Cornette and Vince tabbed Glen to be the younger brother and thus, KANE was born.
With an unforgettable entrance at Bad Blood on October 5, 1997 highlighted by Vince McMahon’s line of “That’s….THAT’S GOTTA BE…..THAT’S GOTTA BE KANE!”, Kane went on to have a 23 year run as “the big red machine” becoming one of the most successful wrestlers of the 21st century.
So what does all of that have to do with SEE NO EVIL? Back in 2001, Vince McMahon grew bored with just wrestling promoting and decided to launch his own football league and film studio. The film studio was tabbed WWE Films and after Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s success as The Scorpion King in The Mummy 2, Vince decided to produce a standalone Scorpion King movie. The Rock would also be in other movies such as Walking Tall and The Rundown but the subject of today’s write-up didn’t happen until 2006. Back in the late 90’s, Vince bucked a trend in wrestling of old time “bookers” which meant the man in charge of match-making and storylines. Instead, Vince started employing story writers that didn’t come from a pro wrestling background but could make up a story. One of those men was Dan Madigan and he came up with the concept of SEE NO EVIL. WWE already had a ton of action movies with “Stone Cold” Steve Austin in The Condemned, John Cena in The Marine and the previously mentioned movies starring The Rock. Dan decided to take the plunge into horror and naturally the 7 foot monster Kane would be tabbed as the lead.
So what’s SEE NO EVIL actually about? A prequel scene has Officer Frank Williams (Steven Vidler – A Ring of Endless Light 2002) and his partner Blaine (Corey Parker Robinson – TV series The Wire) stumble upon an abandoned house of a deranged serial murderer. Several victims are found with their eyes ripped out when the killer attacks and kills Blaine before hacking off the arm of Frank. Frank guns him down and the story picks up four years later. Frank and his new partner Hannah (Tiffany Lamb – Body Melt 1993) lead a group of juvenile delinquents sentenced to community service. Their mission is to clean up the old Blackwell Hotel and turn it into a homeless shelter.
The delinquents are stolen goods merchant Russell (Mikhael Wilder – Terra Nova 2011), computer hacker Richie (Craig Horner – TV series Legend of The Seeker), hothead Christine (Christina Vidal – Freaky Friday 2003), shoplifter Zoe (Rachael Taylor – Red Dog 2011), drug dealer Michael (Luke Pegler – Hacksaw Ridge 2016), Michael’s ex Kira (Samantha Noble – Gabriel 2007), home burglar Tye (Michael J Pagan – Gridiron Gang 2006) and anarchist Melissa (Penny McNamee – TV series Home & Away). The owner of the hotel Margret (Cecily Polson – Muriel’s Wedding 1994) gives the scoop of what she wants done and the kids get to work.
What they don’t know is the killer from the beginning of the movie is here, Jacob Goodnight (Kane) and he’s going to administer some vigilante justice on the interlopers. How will a group of juveniles defeat the 7 foot monster? Watch the movie to find out.
The good news is SEE NO EVIL is actually watchable if you view it as a straight slasher. The problem is the slasher genre died out in the early 2000’s. Another problem is professional wrestling has a stigma of being low brow entertainment. It was especially bad back in 2006 being just under a decade removed from the “Attitude Era” that taught an entire generation of kids to do crotch chops and middle fingers. Another factor was the promotion of the movie. Casual viewers and non-wrestling fans scoffed at the idea of a slasher coming out in 2006 starring a wrestler and hardcore wrestling fans were miffed because they turned it into a storyline. Wrestling fans in 2006 saw Kane gradually going insane on live television as the date “May 19th” began appearing. The culmination was Kane having to wrestle an imposter version of himself, which was just Doc Gallows of The Good Brothers looking ridiculous in the 1997 Kane outfit. The sad part was, the pay-per-view blowoff match was won by Gallows. Not only did the promotion of the movie stink, Kane didn’t even win the match that went with it. What was “May 19th” anyway? It was the release date of SEE NO EVIL, May 19, 2006. To make matters worse
As a slasher film was SEE NO EVIL good? Well it did have plenty of gore and annoying characters you couldn’t wait to see Kane rip to shreds. We got dismemberments, maimings, angry hungry dogs, electrocutions and one scene with a cell phone that you’ll find very satisfying. The plot twist at the end was rather weak but at least the story was easy to follow. The acting was a big bucket of meh but its a slasher movie. The primarily Australian cast went on to do some good things but they weren’t asked to portray Cyrano De Bergerac here. How did it do at the box office? The budget was 8 million and it grossed……18 million. One factor in that low number was it was released the same week as The Davinci Code. On a personal note, going on a date to see The Davinci Code, dropping the girl off, pick up my male friend and going to see SEE NO EVIL was an experience to say the least. The bottom line was not many people were interested in 2006 to see an outdated slasher starring a pro wrestler chopping up Australian actors. Its one of those situations where a movie ages better as time goes on when viewed on its own rather than a relic of a long gone time period.
As for Kane himself, he turned out alright. After his wrestling career wound down he successfully ran for Mayor of Knox County Tennessee where he currently endorses our current administration. Imagine if Glen Jacobs eventually replaces Donald Trump as president? Highly unlikely as that is, it just shows you how wrestling can get you places. After all, Mayor Jacobs once gave a tombstone piledriver to our current United States Secretary of Education Linda McMahon on live television. If only political elections were settled that way, right? All in all, SEE NO EVIL was a time capsule of a time where the slasher was dying and Vince McMahon thought he was Walter Hill or Frederic Fuchs.
Eventually SEE NO EVIL got a sequel with everyone’s favorite scream queen Danielle Harris as the lead….but that’s story for another day. SEE NO EVIL is currently on Amazon Prime and its worth a one time watch for curiosity reasons. Just don’t chokeslam the nearest bystander in the process.
