PopHorror Let's Get Scared
Every summer should have some sort of aquatic horror film. It should be a yearly mandatory submission for all major studios. Saltwater, freshwater, it can be their choice, but something should hit the screen that makes us a little less cavalier about swimming anywhere that isn’t man-made and chlorinated. Sunburned and vacationing masses should leave the theater a little more cautious and a lot more paranoid. I was old enough to see Jaws 3 (not the best in the series, but in 3D!) in the theater, and I’ve been in for any killer fish, reptile or sea-faring mammal flick that releases in the summer ever since. For the past three years, I’ve gotten my wish. In 2016, we got The Shallows, and in 2017, it was 47 Meters Down. This year, it’s The Meg.
Every killer shark film looms in the huge shadow of Jaws, which is an almost impossible standard to equal. Some of it was timing, in that Jaws was the absolute very first summer killer fish blockbuster, but most of it is that it’s a near perfect film. So, I always try to be objectionable when watching water horror films. I’ve come to the realization that nothing is going to be as good as Jaws. It’s very freeing and gets a lot of baggage out of the way early on. With that being said, The Meg is fun, but maybe not what you’re expecting.
Directed by Jon Turteltaub, The Meg begins with a deep sea rescue of a submarine by the heroic Jonas Taylor (Jason Statham), a specialist in diving to depths uncharted. He makes a difficult decision, and the scrutiny of whether it is was the right call makes him quit the business, wear a straw hat, and become a man of leisure. When an exploration team’s diving vessel breaks through what was thought to be the deepest part of the ocean, something big bumps them, and renders them trapped. Since Statham is the best in the game so, of course, they have to fly someplace exotic to track him down and persuade him to get back in the game. I can accept it because it’s Jason freaking Statham, the last of the Bronson-esque tough guys. He doesn’t completely shave his head and leaves it unapologetically stubbly, and he also doesn’t change his accent from film to film, no matter what character he’s playing. He plays Jason Statham in everything.
He’s met by Morris (Rainn Wilson), the benefactor of the deep sea research station, an eclectic billionaire. Ever since Samuel Jackson in Deep Blue Sea, the visiting rich billionaire that funded all the madness has about as much of a survival rate as a couple having sex in the woods. So, I’m watching him carefully. The masterminds of the operation is Zhang (Winston Chao), and his beautiful daughter, Suyin (Bingbing Li). She’s thrown herself into her and her father’s work after a difficult relationship, and she also has custody of her 8 year-old daughter, Meiying (Shuya Sophia Cai).
Backing them up as the support staff are DJ (Page Kennedy), Jonas’ arch nemesis, Heller (Robert Taylor), and hacker Jaxx (Ruby Rose). Jonas can’t say no to the rescue because his ex-wife is one of the members of the exploration team stranded with hours to survive. When they return to the surface, the big thing that caused all the trouble in the first place comes with them.
Up to that point, the film is a surprisingly slow burn. The majority of the film is a cat and mouse game of Jonas and the team trying to track and kill the Megalodon. The best sequence in the film is a cage dive scene where a quasi-futuristic diving cage that looks like the little thing at the bank that gets sucked through all the clear tubes gets dragged around by the shark like a chew toy. In a highlight reel of great shark film moments, it should be in there somewhere. The swimmer attacks happen much later, close to the climax of the film, and that was disappointing. The beach terror is only a very small part of it.
Final Thoughts
I liked The Meg, but it isn’t anything I haven’t seen before. Tropes abound with the tortured and misunderstood hero, an honorable visionary, his beautiful daughter, and a superficial rich guy. Ever since Twister, I’ve had a low tolerance for hip, wise-cracking scientists, and there’s some of that in there, too. The Meg is more action than horror film. I read that Jason Statham was surprised at the direction the film took over the script that he read. I’d be interested to see the differences.
Some kid is going to have a cool memory of seeing The Meg on the big screen over summer vacation, and I absolutely love the notion of that. For that reason, I recommend it. I give it 7 out of 10.
