Orcs! (2012) Movie Review: LARPers from Hell!

Orcs, the brutal beasties of ancient myth and legend! Popularized by both J.R.R Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings series as well as Dungeons & Dragons, these formidable foes have served as the perfect cannon fodder for various adventurers and heroes for generations. Surely, modern fantasy would not be the same with out the magnificent monsters to cleave with a heavy sword or take out with a long bow! But what would happen if they appeared in the modern day, in a state park, facing modern rangers just trying to not get fired? Today’s movie gladly answers that question and more as we dive into a low budget beauty directed by Andrew Black (under the name James McPherson) simply titled Orcs!

Our story begins with a prologue as we see a park ranger in the early 1900s managing to stop a horde of creatures from escaping a mine by collapsing it with dynamite, sacrificing himself along with a few of his foes.

Moustache aficionados felt a deep void in their ranks that day!

Fast forward to 2012, where we meet Ranger Cal Robertson (Adam Johnson), a park ranger at the ironically named Balancing Rock National Park. He is soon joined by volunteer deputy Hobart “Hobie” Moss (Maclain Nelson) and his on-again-off-again girlfriend, Katie, as the park soon becomes infested with a returning horde of Orcs!

I can’t quite put my finger on it but this scene is vaguely familiar!

I first found this movie on Amazon Prime. Being a lover of the low budget indie film that I am, I watched the trailer that was provided and became instantly hooked. Some of the comedy in Orcs! would be a good fit for a later Police Academy film or even a Broken Lizard movie.

On that note, this movie isn’t without its flaws. While watching it, you’ll realize that the Orcs themselves are fairly lacking in the effects department, looking like they went shopping for costumes at a Halloween shop – not that I have a problem with that. I will point out though that to they managed to circumvent the costume issue by having a majority of the Orc infantry wearing full face helmets… minus the leader, of course!

Daddy?
I’m never drinking tequila again!

In the off chance you’re tired of the zombie apocalypse, then Orcs! is the movie for you. While it won’t win any awards for theatrical presentation, the ingenuity alone should at least land it on your watch list. This whole movie is more a less a loving homage to everything Tolkien and Tolkien inspired, as well as providing a decent laugh every so often. So if you’re feeling up to it, this low budget guilty pleasure just might be for you!

About Zachary Howard

Just a dude stuck in small town in Washington State. Grew up on bad movies, loud music, violent video games, and I thing I turned out normal!

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